“Time is what we want most, but what we use worst.” ─ William Penn
Bessie now has a middle name: Shadow. She is self-isolating right beside me. Inside or outdoors, she is always there, like your shadow on a sunny day. Consequently, we are conversing more. Well, I’m conversing and she is listening, or pretending to listen. The idle thoughts randomly listed below have been shared only with Bessie, until now. The comments and questions are not intended to diminish in any way the importance of social distancing and self-quarantine behaviors in the collective effort to diminish the impact of COVID-19. These are just….idle thoughts.
• What are all those Patriot fans going to do with their #12 jerseys now that Brady is a Buccaneer?
• If social distancing and the six-foot rule become the new standards, is this the end of whispering?
• What will the impact of all these travel restrictions and self-quarantine behaviors be on Climate Change?
• I’ll bet the hardest part of the COVID-19 isolation for some people is not being able to hear themselves talk.
• For those people who do the math and say, “The hell with it, I’ll take my chances”, please don’t.
• What percentage of the World population is absolutely clueless about what’s going on?
• Would the Democratic Party delegate count be different if this virus had hit right after the NH primary, before the South Carolina primary and Super Tuesday? (Do you think Bernie has pondered this?)
• What would this be like without the Internet, cell phones, and modern technology?
• When Boomers were growing up in the 1950s, before there were vaccines, the child on the block who had measles, a serious disease, instantly became the most popular kid in the neighborhood. Parents wanted their children to acquire immunity. Times have changed.
• I miss live sports. You can only watch re-runs of your favorite teams so many times.
• If someone pets my dog at the end of her 6-foot leash while we’re on a walk, do I have to bathe the poor thing in rubbing alcohol when we get home?
• Will the divorce rate go up or down after mass isolation in close quarters? I’m guessin’ up, way up.
• Uh oh! What about all the men and women who have their hair colored by a stylist. If this goes on for couple of months there will be lots of grey showing. Nancy Pelosi and Donald Trump, in desperation, will probably remove salons from the non-essential list.
• We haven’t heard that the virus can enter the body through the ears. Maybe there is something special about earwax. Imagine rubbing the stuff on your hands?
• I wonder what the next big thing will be.
• Recently, the Center for Disease Control, the World Health Organization and CNN all reported different numbers. Imagine that?
• Shouldn’t we have just a little compassion for the 45 million people in the U.S. who’ve had or will have the flu this season with no special recognition or sympathy, not to mention the 30 - 40,000 poor souls who have died or will die.
• I can see it now, designer germ prevention masks: Louis Vuitton, Ralph Lauren, Hermes…Old Navy.
• The Major League Baseball Season would be underway by now.
• Can you imagine if friends visited for a weekend in mid-March before this picked up speed, and someone in the group tested positive? The whole crew would have had to quarantine together. We all know what house guests smell like after three days, but two weeks??? Ever catch a whiff of rotting squid?
• It occurred to me at the drugstore the other day that the stylus used to sign for a prescription must be LOADED with germs. How long before we are all carrying our own personal stylus? Any entrepreneurs listening?
• Is this the end of mistletoe as we know it?
• The threat of lung cancer and other serious potential health problems hasn’t stopped people around the world from smoking cigarettes. Maybe this virus will.
• Is this the end of germ-infested cash? Will we ever take a dollar bill out of our purses or wallets the same way again?
• When snow falls, does it bury the airborne corona virus respiratory droplets and temporarily purify the air? How ‘bout rainfall?
• How long before people start wearing goggles to prevent them from touching their eyes and giving the virus a toehold. Get busy Ray Ban and Oakley!
• What will historians claim caused the greater generation gap, corona virus or the war in Viet Nam?
• If a national sampling of U.S. voters had to choose either a. b. or c., how do you think their answers would sort out?
o A. self-isolate for as long as requested, remain healthy, lose my job, deplete my savings
o B. keep my job and regular paycheck, take my chances
o C. keep working and donate 2% of my annual income to virus research/care/victim support (That would be upwards of $1.3 billion if my math is correct.)
• You sure do learn a lot about people during times like these.
• If it was determined that a certain percentage of dogs or cats was randomly spreading a serious virus, would people suddenly put their pets down? Would you?
• What effect will all this home school/online learning have on subsequent standardized test scores? Get your bets in: up or down?
• If you had to choose one, and only one, which would it be:
a.Cell phone b.Television c.Tablet d.Laptop
• The wave of patriotism after the terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001 led to increased enlistments in the Armed Forces and greater status for First Responders. Will this virus have a similar positive impact on applications to med schools, nursing programs and volunteer or full-time First Responder positions?
• I wonder if the live animal food market in Wuhan, China has reopened? Thinking there will likely be an outbreak of vegan and vegetarian dining in the region.
• F. Scott Fitzgerald said, “The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.” Bump into many people with a first-rate intelligence lately?
• Laughter is and always will be the best medicine.
• When they’ve just about had it, teachers can say, “Okay, everyone get in their chair, sit up straight, and NO TALKING or you’ll miss recess.” What is the parental, home school/online learning version of that?
• A friend recently went to the grocery store at 6:00 am sporting rubber gloves and a surgical mask. Arriving home, she stripped down in her garage, put her clothes and mask in the washer, removed her rubber gloves, took a shower, put on clean clothes and a new pair of rubber gloves, cleaned her groceries with disinfectant wipes, put them away and washed her hands. Will this become standard operating procedure?
• I’ll know I’ve reached the tipping point when I join the Bingo game.
• I can see it now when life returns to “normal”, people cleaning their faces with Lysol wipes after being kissed on the cheek by an absent minded, habit-ingrained friend at a cocktail party. Wait… do you think cocktail parties will become part of our folklore, referred to like the ancient, uncivilized customs of cave dwellers?
• At what age are parents forbidden from participating in their child’s home school /online learning program? Guess it depends on whom you ask.
• I wonder what my parents would say if they were around for this?
• My brothers and I were lovingly spanked as kids to keep us in line. My mother’s hand would be in a bandage with an ice pack by now.
• How long before some business or company uses the coronavirus fear directly in an ad campaign to sell their consumer products?
• When a quarterback misses a wide-open receiver in the end zone, teammates don’t come back to the huddle and say, “You jerk! How could you do that?” They say, “shake it off, we’ll get ‘em next time.” Remember, we are all in the same huddle here.
• Keep a to-do list and cross things off. When this is over you don’t want to be the person who says, “I wish I had a few more days to shelter in place”.
• A hypothesis: Women text MUCH more than men.
• How long before appropriate social distancing is pictured in various catalogs from companies like L.L.Bean, J.Crew, etc.?
• I’ll bet parent/teacher conferences take on a whole new dimension when this is over.
• When more normal times begin to return, what are the odds the airlines will spread out the seating a bit in coach and keep the middle seat open? A million to one, maybe?
• Will anyone ever “cut in” on the dance floor again? And does this mean we can kiss the jitterbug, the waltz and any close dancing good-bye?
• Imagine never sharing an ice cream cone again.
• Wouldn’t it be interesting if Global Warming turned out to be the corona virus’ staunchest foe?
• Bessie has been completely blind for over four years. I wonder if she remembers what we look like.
• What do you think will be the first thing most people do once their freedom to roam returns? (Invest in that industry now!)
• Sweet sixteen and never been kissed? Well…be patient my young friend.
• Interesting how some people are more invested in looking back and blaming as opposed to looking ahead and fixing/helping.
• Another annoying thing is when people have to say, “I told you so, I told you so.” That really helps, doesn’t it?
• Does anyone else wish their mother hadn’t thrown out that baseball card collection that was, “taking up too much space in the closet?” It would be fun to look through those cards again. Might help pay the oil bill, too.
• Happy are the families that saved those old, 1000-piece puzzles that fill up a card table.
• When this is over and parents are relieved of their home school/online learning responsibilities, I dare someone to argue against higher salaries for teachers.
• Why is it considered news when a celebrity tests positive for the corona virus? Are they catching a different strain, the deluxe version?
• Does anyone else wander aimlessly into their garage, yard or basement in search of a project to keep them busy?
• Have you noticed how so many people these days seem to have expert medical knowledge and vocabulary, and speak with the authority of a doctor? It would be interesting to see their high school biology and chemistry grades.
• No one looks good on a FaceTime call or Zoom, nobody……except my wife.
